God help us.
What I’ve learned from this video: hammers can ‘clamp’ and logic is obviously a socialist construct which these folks carefully (and successfully) avoid.
Who Let My Blog Out?
It was either this or "Holy Shit, Batman!"
Nov 19
Nov 18
No, fuck you, you uppity bitch.
I hope Satan tells you to ‘Shh’ as you burn in eternal hellfire.
Dear Arlington (VA) Public Library,
You had a collection agency call my cell phone and leave a not-very-nice message encouraging me to pay the $43 fine I owe to your library as soon as humanly possible to avoid further problems. This, of course, pertaining to the two books on the Lindbergh kidnapping that I took out for a paper FIVE YEARS AGO and had never heard word one about in as many years.
Fine, odds are I got drunk and lost your books, I probably owe you that money. So I sent along the check promptly, complete with a very nice handwritten note. The very least you could do is cash it, right? Instead of sitting on it for weeks? I still don’t know if you’ve even gotten this check. It was so important that I had to receive a voice mail that made me feel like I was a felon, but once you get it, it’s just no a priority? Fuck you and the horse you rode in.
I can honestly say I will never take out another book from your piece of shit library. As a matter of fact, I’m actively trying to forget how to read right now just to spite you.
I would sleep in this everyday.
I would sleep in it AND shower in it. And make sweet, passionate love to it.
Charlie: WHY DO WE NEVER PLAY NIGHT CRAWLERS ANYMORE, HUH?
Frank: I don’t know, Charlie!
Dee: What is Night Crawlers?
Dennis: It’s a game where they crawl around at ni— in the night like worms.
Charlie: I never said that.
Frank: Well, that’s what it is.
Charlie: INTERVENTION, INTERVENTION! IS NOTHING PRIVATE, FRANK!? JEEEESUSSS. Look, I like that game, I don’t wanna stop playing it.
Frank: Charlie, we can play that game!
Charlie: Promise!?
Frank: Yeah!
Charlie: Woo! YEAHHHH.
My life would be complete if I could find someone to play Night Crawlers with.
Any takers?
Sunny Mailbag: Glenn Howerton
His answer to the last question (‘Do you guys get along off camera?’) hade me in tears.
Nov 17
Total Recall is one of my favorite action movies, so imagine my excitement when someone managed to capture the subtlety of its dystopian themes in a mere 3 1/2-minutes.
“Kuatto lives!” —The Resistance
I just watched this movie for the first time today and it’s fucking awesome.
“ They all sound the same. All the fake voices of people that I never met… things that didn’t happen.
—
David Spade who was (believe it or not) in fact funny, a long time ago
(via mikekarnell)
I’ve always really liked David Spade and I’ve never been sure why, but I’ll defend him tooth and nail.
Nov 16
Twilight: Three Wolf Moon, written by me and Sarah, directed by Sam, starring the wonderful Aubrey Plaza (now of ‘Parks and Recreation’) and John Gemberling. Digg it!
I had the pleasure of editing this one. Definitely had a lot of fun with it even though I had to watch the New Moon trailer about 923048302 times. I’m curious to see how that movie won’t be ridiculous. Anyway, John and Aubrey killed it. Sam, Vince, and Eva did a kick ass job with it as well. Shout out to Anna for doing a great job designing the titles.
Enjoy it! Reblog it! Digg it!
As anyone who follows this blog knows, I do own this shirt and it really is this awesome.
Nov 10
Nov 09
What I Missed About Connecticut: Exhibit A
I was not the only person in my class wearing a Hartford Whalers hat.
